Midwives play such a huge role in our journey into parenthood - and with all of that experience, they must have a few opinions of their own.
We spoke to Pippa Davies, aka 'Midwife Pip' on social media, about the top five things she wishes all parents knew…
As a midwife, I have had the privilege of guiding many parents through pregnancy, birth, and the postpartum period.
Every journey is unique, but over the years, I have noticed common anxieties and misconceptions that many parents share. Here are the five things I wish all parents knew to help them navigate this incredible journey with calm confidence.
1. Trust your instincts
Modern culture often instils fear and self-doubt, making parents feel like they cannot act or seek help on the strength of a gut feeling or instinct, but the truth is your intuition is a gift, and you should embrace it.
Parenting begins long before birth, and in pregnancy you may feel a deep connection with your baby, so listen to your body and speak up if something feels off.
After birth, while advice from others can be helpful, no one knows your baby better than you. If something doesn’t seem right, trust yourself and seek guidance.
Confidence in your instincts will grow over time, helping it to feel easier to navigate challenges. Parenthood is a learning journey, and believing in yourself is one of the most powerful tools you have.
2. Plans are helpful, but flexibility is key
Many parents approach labour and postpartum with a meticulously detailed plan. However, the reality of this journey is that things don’t always go as planned and so being well informed and having flexibility is crucial.
On this journey there is no one right or wrong way to do anything and it can be easy to compare or act on the experiences of others when your path is unique. What worked for someone else may not work for you and your baby, and that is okay.
Rather than seeing deviations from plans and preferences as “failures,” try to view them as necessary adjustments perfectly matched to you and your little one.
Use the mantra “What would I do if no one else ever knew?” to help you make decisions true to you and your values to try and stay away from unhealthy comparisons.
3. Postpartum recovery takes time and
Many parents focus so much on the birth itself that they don’t think as much about what comes afterward.
The postpartum period, often called the 'fourth trimester', is just as important as pregnancy and birth. Too often, mums feel pressure to 'bounce back' quickly, whether physically, emotionally, or socially.
The truth is your body needs time to recover. Your body has just undergone an immense transformation and self-comion and patience are needed on this journey.
Much like adolescence, becoming a mother is a huge identity shift, often accompanied by joy, uncertainty, and emotional turbulence. Hormonal changes, societal expectations, and the demands of caring for a newborn can make this transition overwhelming. Many mothers feel a mix of love, exhaustion, and self-doubt as they adjust.
Understanding the transition helps to normalise these feelings - change is natural, and growth takes time. Seeking , being kind to yourself, and embracing this evolving identity, can make the journey into motherhood smoother. It can feel tough and it is very normal to not love every moment of this journey.
4. Breastfeeding can be challenging, and that's okay
Many expectant parents assume that breastfeeding will come naturally. While breastfeeding is a biological process, it is also a learned skill for both mum and baby. It can be difficult in the early days, and challenges can appear.
Struggling with breastfeeding does not mean failure. Many women benefit from seeking early. Infant feeding often needs some additional and whilst some baby’s latch well from the beginning, many need more time to learn.
If breastfeeding is a goal, patience and persistence are key. However, parents should feel ed in whatever feeding choices they make.
5. Your mental health matters
Many new parents pour all their energy into caring for their baby while neglecting their own wellbeing. While it’s natural to prioritise your newborn, it’s essential to that your mental and emotional health matter too.
Feelings of exhaustion, self-doubt, and anxiety are normal, but if these feelings become overwhelming or persistent, they shouldn’t be ignored.
Postpartum depression and anxiety can affect both mothers and fathers, yet many parents hesitate to speak up due to fear of judgment.
Seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Self-care is not selfish; it allows you to be the best parent you can be, and even small moments can add up and make a huge difference.
Accepting or even asking for help is always a good idea - you and your baby are the most important thing and the world can wait.
As a midwife, my greatest wish is for parents to feel empowered, informed, and ed throughout this experience. By trusting your body, staying flexible, understanding the realities, seeking help, and prioritising your mental health, you can navigate this journey with more joy, confidence and less worry.
Parenthood is not about perfection. Perfection doesn’t exist, so striving for it is not helpful.
No matter how your journey unfolds, that you are not alone, and in the eyes of your little one you are doing everything perfectly… and after all, their opinion is the one that matters most.
