"I always imagined the birth of my son being this amazing, magical experience and it was just the opposite."
From being overdue, to getting induced, to being rushed into theatre…sometimes labour really doesn't go to plan.
Marnie opens up to us about the birth of her son, Rox and tells us how it wasn't quite as she was imagining.
I always imagined the birth of my son being this amazing, magical experience and it was just the opposite. It was just really traumatic.
Childbirth for me, was definitely the hardest thing that I've ever done in my life. I was two and a half weeks overdue so I went at 42 and a half weeks, which in itself was so uncomfortable. I basically got induced via a pessary. He just wouldn't come out when I was pushing, and I was pushing for a good thirty minutes, and then I got rushed to theater.
I think they attempted to get him out via the suction, he just kept on pulling off. I was so sore. When I came around, I felt this sigh of relief. I was like "oh my God, we've done it!" Like, "he's here, we're both okay." I was in labour for like three days and I was in hospital for two days, so it was like five days of no sleep. Then I came home with a newborn baby, I couldn't sit down, I couldn't walk. It was really tough.
I think it's different for everyone, but it's so important to give yourself that time to heal. Take the help if you need it. Even a straight forward birth, you've got to give yourself that time to rest. I feel like I did ask a lot of people about their birthing stories and what it was like for them, and I just feel like no one's really honest. I do think if people had warned me how bad it can be, then I think I would've been a lot more prepared.
I think when I was going through all that trauma of the birth, I was just so scared…and honestly, that moment when they got him out and they placed him on my chest, I just got this overwhelming relief, and this love, and this happiness. Even though it was really hard, it was honestly so worth it, and if I had to, I'd do it all again for Rox, in a heartbeat.
If you have had a particularly difficult birth, it might take you some time to come to with your experience. This is completely normal.
Chatting to your partner, a friend or a relative might help you process your thoughts. And if you have any other questions or concerns, you can also chat to your midwife, health visitor or GP.
If you need more information or about pre and postnatal illness, BBC Action Line has details of organisations that can help.
